True love

Last week I watched a movie on Netflix titled “Her only choice”.  It is about a young married woman who has been trying to conceive for several years’.  Finally, she is pregnant with her first child.  But, she also finds out that she has an aggressive form of breast cancer.  Her doctor, her husband, and even her parents encourage her to have an abortion so that she can begin cancer treatments immediately and save her life.  She wants to keep her child.  When she is explaining this to her mother, she asks her mother: “Would you be willing to die for me?”  Her mother answers that she absolutely would.  Then, the woman explains: “I feel the same way about the baby inside of me.  I am willing, if necessary, to die for that baby.” Eventually, she receives some treatment while she is pregnant, has a healthy baby and survives breast cancer.

I thought of that movie as I was reflecting on today’s Gospel.  Jesus tells us: “As I have loved you, so you also should love one another.”  Jesus died on the cross for us.  He sacrificed his life for us to give us eternal life.  This is the type of sacrificial love that we should have for each other.

We, as followers of Christ, should be recognized by our love. Jesus says, “This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another”.  We must ask ourselves: Does the world plainly see us as people who reflect Jesus' love? Can it be said of us what was said of the early Christian community, “See how much they love one another”?

Our culture encourages love, but this love is a wimpy love, a love which is based upon a feeling, a love which is there in the good times, but not when times get tough.  Our culture says that it is OK to fall out of love, that’s what no-fault divorce is there for.  Our culture says that it is OK to kill the baby in the womb even after that baby has a heartbeat.  Our culture says that it is OK to terminate a life when suffering is involved.  Our culture doesn’t know what love is all about.  Now, I’m not condemning those who have fallen for the lies of our culture.  Like the devil, our culture can make these actions seem attractive.

True love embraces suffering and sacrifice.  True love cares more for the other person’s needs than for your own.    When times get tough, the couple in love accepts the challenge as the woman in the movie did.  When times get tough toward the end of our lives, we offer up the pain and the suffering that we endure, we don’t run away from it.  When a couple has a surprise pregnancy, they accept the challenge of the child and quickly grow to love it.

In the first reading, Paul tells the members of the early church: “It is necessary for us to undergo many hardships to enter the kingdom of God.”  That statement was true in the first century and it is just as true in today.  At times, life is hard.  But, today’s hardship is short and the kingdom of heaven is forever.  The second reading tells is that in heaven: “He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there shall be no more death or mourning, wailing or pain, for the old order has passed away.”  As we struggle with hardships, we must always keep the goal, eternal life in heaven with the Father, in mind.

The new commandment of love also offers an antidote to our human tendency to withdraw when our feelings get hurt. We are commanded to stretch ourselves, all the way to the cross, if necessary. We are commanded to go beyond ourselves, even when it may mean being hurt again. Unless we do this, real love is unable to flourish. We cannot forget the uniqueness of what we have been given: a covenant with Christ himself. By our efforts we keep that covenant alive and vital: we keep the sign of love ever visible to our world.

Jesus’ love is a model, a gift, and a challenge.  Jesus provides the ultimate role model for us.  He shows us what love is all about.  His love is a gift.  He loves us each unconditionally – sinners and saints.  And it is also a challenge.  We can never love Jesus as much as he loves us.  But we can try given our own limitations. 

We all carry our own unique crosses.  Our crosses aren’t as heavy as Jesus’ cross was.  But, at times, they can seem overwhelming to us.  Let Jesus help you with your cross.  Don’t put down your cross; carry it proudly.  Eventually, this cross will lead you to heaven where all tears will be wiped away.